May 2013
9 posts
4 tags
There are no losers in beer pong, just losers in life.
– Geani
3 tags
I need you to be sluttier.
– Diana
I do like black people though…
– Cassandra
3 tags
I’m special and I have a brain.
– Marisol
3 tags
Those were my favorite capris, just long enough so I don’t have to shave...
– Roxie
If you have a big sail boat and you know how to sail it…
– Jeremy F.
2 tags
We’re all Charlie Sheenin’.
– Jeremy F.
2 tags
Her boobs are younger than me.
– Chris G.
2 tags
I just wanna watch Golden Girls.
– Joe
April 2013
18 posts
2 tags
I just read 10 little known facts about Channing Tatum.
– Drew
1 tag
I can’t believe there’s an Iceland.
– Adam
3 tags
I febreeze myself in the bathroom.
– Adam
2 tags
Everything looks better on her…like my dick.
– Adam
3 tags
I’m all ears…and nose.
– Drew
3 tags
Tomatoes suck.
– Adrian B.
2 tags
You gotta ask yourself “Drew are your pants coming off?” Yes, yes...
– Drew
3 tags
3 Mexicans and a cup.
– Hector
3 tags
How do long haired people get married?
– Drew
1 tag
I gotta pee, I see Dennis Rodman.
– Drew
Geani: He's quick on his skateboard.
Drew: He can become a child molester that way.
5 tags
I’m 30 years old, I know how to control my throw up.
– Drew
4 tags
I can’t remember the last time I sneezed on a weekend.
– Steven N.
You’re not an alcoholic, you’re making friends.
– Jason
6 tags
Joe: You're gonna miss his opening act, he's been practicing in the shower.
Geani: I don't wanna see Drew masturbate on stage.
4 tags
I am a ginger raised by wolves.
– Garrett
3 tags
I’m the king of Success Rice.
– Drew
3 tags
There’s a lot of female lesbians.
– Herman
March 2013
15 posts
She’s a society hopper.
– West
4 tags
Sometimes…poopin’ ain’t easy.
– Drew
It bites you right in the throat-nuts.
– Roxie
4 tags
Miley Cyrus smokes the same kind of cigarettes as me.
– Drew
4 tags
My feet are awesome, they’ve won awards.
– Drew
4 tags
Fuck! All of these bitches wanna get married! What if I wanna get married...
– Marisol
3 tags
E.T., whatever happened to that kid? Josh Hartnett.
– Drew
Cheese
Geani: My legs hurt and I don’t know why.
Garrett: Running through someone’s mind…
Peanut farts. That’s not gonna be good.
– Drew
…so I just said the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.
– Drew
It’s obvious she was meant to be a girl even though she was born a boy.
– Garrett
College
Geani: How did you go to college and I didn't?
Drew: I'm cute...
…ever since then I’ve never been able to talk to racoons.
– Drew
That’s a good looking white dude, huh?
– Drew
Man, I really wish I flew my kite the other day.
– Joe
February 2013
28 posts
You’ve got boogers all over your boobs and your life.
– Drew
If you’re on your knees all day you’ll be ok.
– Joe
Whoa! A snake! It’s just a little baby one…it might’ve been a...
– Drew
I guess I’ll go gay.
– Trevor
Shit I forget if I’m 27 or 28.
– Jeremy S.
I am a judge in the court of life.
– Geani
Your head reminds me of a goldfish.
– Kylie to Drew
If you chase balls you’re eventually gonna hurt yourself.
– Mike Oransky